Nehemiah said, "Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is sacred to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the LORD is your strength." Nehemiah 8:10
I have not been happy lately. Not spending time with family members can make me sad instead of happy. Spending cherished moments with family can make me happy, very happy. I like feeling happy. Feeling deep down happiness, well... it makes me happy!
Happiness comes and it goes, depending on a multitude of different circumstances.
I was so happy to see my grandson receive awards for his hard work in middle school Band.
He was happy, too.
Happiness is fleeting and was soon stolen. The joy he brings to my life remains.
Spending time with my daughter at the beach on Mother's Day made us both happy. 
Although the real reason we were there on Mother's Day makes me very sad.
Finding myself in a place I never dreamed I would encounter is more than enough to overwhelm my heart with grief. Still, the joy of the Lord remains my strength. Some things would be impossible to bear without that joy.
Even when I am unhappy, joy is with me. I have briefly felt that joy slipping after the death of a baby, while watching my children make life changing mistakes, and when I have made life changing mistakes myself. Thank God that joy is not dependant on my mood or circumstance.
During the past 6 months I have enjoyed many things. While the unhappiness fell like a fog around my heart, it could not permeate my heart. Only because of God's grace and mercy did it not find a home there.
Recently my daughter and son-in-law suffered the loss of a fifth unsuccessful pregnancy. How does my daughter remain hopeful? Why is she still smiling? Could it be because the joy of her faith in Christ gives her strength and hope?
The presence in my home of my only grandson has been denied me since November 15th, 2009. I am reminded of something he said to me and his papa last summer, "I guess ya'll are pretty lonely when I am not here." Neither of us knowing that soon we would find out just how lonely. At the time we had laughed and said, "Not really." We looked forward to his visits each week, however, we did not want him to feel responsible for our happiness.
Helpless to change the current circumstances over which I have no control, I had to do something. Sitting, helplessly waiting is not an option I am comfortable with. I needed to do something. Today I did this.
The yellow ribbon will remain until my grandson is free to visit again.
"Yet the LORD longs to be gracious to you; therefore he will rise up to show you compassion. For the LORD is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for him! " Isaiah 30:18
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