SHARING GOD'S LOVE!

One of God's greatest gifts is children.

Mix that gift with BUBBLES and it is pure joy!

The children dance with joy!

They really love me my bubbles.

   "See that you do not despise one of these little ones.

For I tell you that in heaven their angels always

see the face of my Father who is in heaven."

Matthew 18:10 ESV

FBC BLOCK PARTY
Thank you Pastor Harrison!

Change Is A-Comin'

Going to lunch with my daughter today was memorable. Dining at our favorite restaurant for the last time as simply Mother and Daughter. Things will change and we can hardly wait to be Mother, Daughter and Granddaughter! The missing piece of us will be arriving in approximately two weeks.

So many lunches have been spent dreaming of this child and how wonderful it would be to have a little one to share our special times. God has heard our prayers and answered. Praise Him from whom all blessings flow!

A BLOG WORTH WAITING FOR!

THE BEST BLOG EVER!

HAPPY AND JOY ARE TWO DIFFERENT WORDS

Nehemiah said, "Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is sacred to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the LORD is your strength." Nehemiah 8:10

I have not been happy lately. Not spending time with family members can make me sad instead of happy. Spending cherished moments with family can make me happy, very happy. I like feeling happy. Feeling deep down happiness, well... it makes me happy!

Happiness comes and it goes, depending on a multitude of different circumstances.

I was so happy to see my grandson receive awards for his hard work in middle school Band.

He was happy, too.

Happiness is fleeting and was soon stolen. The joy he brings to my life remains.

Spending time with my daughter at the beach on Mother's Day made us both happy.

Although the real reason we were there on Mother's Day makes me very sad.

Finding myself in a place I never dreamed I would encounter is more than enough to overwhelm my heart with grief. Still, the joy of the Lord remains my strength. Some things would be impossible to bear without that joy.

Even when I am unhappy, joy is with me. I have briefly felt that joy slipping after the death of a baby, while watching my children make life changing mistakes, and when I have made life changing mistakes myself. Thank God that joy is not dependant on my mood or circumstance.

During the past 6 months I have enjoyed many things. While the unhappiness fell like a fog around my heart, it could not permeate my heart. Only because of God's grace and mercy did it not find a home there.

Recently my daughter and son-in-law suffered the loss of a fifth unsuccessful pregnancy. How does my daughter remain hopeful? Why is she still smiling? Could it be because the joy of her faith in Christ gives her strength and hope?

The presence in my home of my only grandson has been denied me since November 15th, 2009. I am reminded of something he said to me and his papa last summer, "I guess ya'll are pretty lonely when I am not here." Neither of us knowing that soon we would find out just how lonely. At the time we had laughed and said, "Not really." We looked forward to his visits each week, however, we did not want him to feel responsible for our happiness.

Helpless to change the current circumstances over which I have no control, I had to do something. Sitting, helplessly waiting is not an option I am comfortable with. I needed to do something. Today I did this.

The yellow ribbon will remain until my grandson is free to visit again.

"Yet the LORD longs to be gracious to you; therefore he will rise up to show you compassion. For the LORD is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for him! " Isaiah 30:18

SNOW? It's a big deal around here!

It has been 40 years since we saw snow... Well, not really. There was the blizzard of '73 and the 'surprise' snow that shut the city down 6 or 7 years ago. I can't visualize that exact date due to PTSD.
My boss's error in judgement that day cost me big time. Because she was from a state which frequently experienced snow, she could not comprehend what the big deal was for us. She scoffed at the excitement and urgency to get out of town. Therefore, I waited too long to leave and could not move my frozen Lincoln out of the parking lot. I stood in line with all the other stranded motorists and paid a ridiculous amount to spend the night two blocks away at the Marriott (where the power went out and I wept for my nice warm fireplace at home). It was the first and only time I have been given a toothbrush along with my room key. No one checking in was prepared for an overnight stay.

But I digress.... anything not frequently seen becomes either very special or very terrifying, depending on your personal circumstances. While I am concerned for those who will suffer from the cold I cannot ignore the beauty of snow flakes floating and swirling to the ground. I cherish the first moments outside after the snow has ended and before drivers have ventured onto the slippery roads. The hushed silence of a fresh snow is a rare and amazing gift. Moments of not a single sound as the miracle stops us in our tracks. Perhaps this is God's reason, His joy, for sending the snow. To force His frantically busy children to pause a moment to witness His wondrous works. Like the rare snowman below.

Truth be told, I had nothing to do with making this snowman. My mother told us children that it was too cold to go out, so we did not get to play in the snow. She went outside, built the snowman and then allowed us to come out to have our picture taken with it.

There were many rumors, drawn from fact, that the snow was full of dirt, pollution and nuclear fallout. I thought for years that my mother did not want us to get sick and was too unfamiliar with snow to know that it would not hurt us. But now I wonder if she actually wanted some time to herself to play in the snow.

If you have snow today how dirty is it? Do this to see:

Gather these items:

a plastic container that is empty, clean, and has a lid
a coffee filter or piece of paper towel
a bowl
a magnifying glass

Fill the container with fresh snow
Put the lid on the container and let the snow melt.
After it has melted hold the coffee filter or paper towel over the bowl.

Pour the melted snow slowly over the filter or paper into the bowl.

What do you see piling up on the paper or filter?

If you can't tell, use the magnifying glass.

(I am not sure I want to ruin my fantasy)

~

"From the fullness of His grace,

we have all received one blessing after another."

~John 1:16 (NIV

CHRISTMAS IN YOUR HEART

"He who has not Christmas in his heart,
Will not find it under a tree." Roy L. Smith

~

I often wonder what people are celebrating

when I observe the massive amount of lights,

snowmen and other inflatable decorations

covering the yards.

If they were all believers

and followers of Christ,

then the world would be

a great deal kinder

than it is.

What are they celebrating?


Homes are overflowing

with new toys, clothing

and electronics.

If they do not believe

in the Jesus

whose birth we honor...

What are they celebrating?


I wonder...

although I do not mind.

They resemble toddlers

who wave flags

at military parades.

The little ones do not know

about freedom

or valor.

Yet, they are swept along

by the excitement.

One day

the Christmas celebrants may understand

what it is they are celebrating.

I pray for that day to come.

~

"Behold, You desire truth in the inner being;
make me therefore to know wisdom
in my inmost heart."
Psalm 51:6

NO WORRIES

Today I ventured into Babies R Us to choose a gift for an upcoming shower. I had been in this store numerous times to purchase gifts for expectant or new Moms. I had even browsed here with my own daughter when she was pregnant.

Today I was caught off guard by the overwhelming emotion as I stepped through the door. My eyes darted quickly away from the racks of pink and blue onesies and tiny precious shoes. My heart suddenly felt so heavy. I turned towards the checkout counter and hurriedly grabbed a gift card.

One day I would walk through the aisles again and sigh over the adorable small creations, but not today. Today a gift card was the best I could do.

As I walked out into the sunshine of a perfect sun filled day, I did not see it. Tears threatened to turn into sobs. I took a deep breath and attempted push the pain away.

I think I must never show how much my heart breaks for her, and for me. I think I must forever be her cheerleader. But then I read this and know that today she is mine.

I Can Still Feel Him in My Arms

Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day

is observed by lighting candles on October 15 at 7:00 p.m.

to honor and remember our children.

~

I have felt that I didn't quite fit in this day because

I had not given birth to the infant I lost,

but God surely gave this baby to me.

My first child was not mine but I named him and I loved him.

Spencer was our first foster child.

He was brought straight from the hospital to our arms.

He was beautiful and no one knew at the time

that he had a heart murmur and cystic fibrosis.

His funeral was just 3 months later, on Christmas Eve .

It was a long time ago and yet, I can still feel him in my arms.

You never get over it, but

with God you get through it.

~

Today my daughter lit 4 candles and my heart breaks for her.

~

"..I knew you before I formed you in your mothers womb.."

Jeremiah 1:5

Toddlers, Tiaras & Swimsuits in Vegas

Am I just jaded from years of advocating for abused children in court and reading heartbreaking case files? I mean, is it just me? Or do others see the incongruity of little girls in two piece swim suits parading (or gyrating as a TV commentator remarked) their bodies in Vegas? Not to mention exposing your child on national television? What are these parents thinking?

What I am thinking is that every pedophile in America is TiVo-ing this program.

~

"For wisdom is better than rubies,

And all the things one may desire cannot be compared with her."

Proverbs 8:11

My LEGACY

"Let each of you look out not only for his own interests,
but also for the interests of others."
Phillippians 2:4 NKJV

Today my daughter completed training

to serve as a volunteer guardian ad litem

to represent abused and neglected children.
~
Because I have served in the same capacity for twenty three years,

I am thrilled
that she has chosen to follow in my footsteps.
~
Actually she will be walking in her own steps,

but it does feel good to think that I
may have had some influence on her decision.

~

She is a big part of my legacy.

I won't embarress her by saying I am proud of her.

She can be pleased with herself;

while yet remaining humble, of course.

~

Iay may oudpray ofay ouyay, earday!

~

President Brings God back to Schools!

I realized after reading this that something wonderful happened this week in our schools.

Our President indicated in his speech that he wants students to follow his example. He then ended his speech with God Bless You and God Bless America. I encourage all students and teachers to follow your President's example! Ask God's blessing on each other and America each day.

I am so excited that President Obama brought God back to our classrooms!

IT DOES A BODY GOOD!

I love my daughter's blog on bad manners reverence in church! read it here

It does a mother's heart good to see results of her investment of time and training.

On Mother's Day when we were driving to our Island destination, I was back seat (actually front passenger) driving. I hate bridges and spoke harshly regarding her driving style while crossing the bridges to the Island. There is no driving style on a bridge that will completely satisfy me, but keeping to the inner lanes does lesson my angst. Anyway, she didn't even act offended. Wow! She may have been offended, but she didn't act offended. She let it go. A very adult attitude.

And today she expects those who are worshiping her Lord to act worshipful! Just like she was taught! I love it!

" Ascribe to the LORD the glory due his name;

worship the LORD in the splendor of his holiness."

Psalm 29:2

Two Reasons I Celebrate Mother's Day!

Garbage In/Garbage Out

For several years I have been intrigued
by the number of otherwise smart,
thoughtful friends
who put CSI in their list of Fav things.

Tonight I accidentally was faced
with the opening scenes of this program.

The newscast ended...
I was busy ...
and neglected to change the channel.

There I am
winding down
from a lovely Sunday
and suddenly
thrust into my line of vision
is a woman
(of course, it is always the women
who are beaten, raped, chopped up)

who has been sawed in half.

Believe me
when I say
that this
is not
a vision
I want
imprinted
into
my brain
as I am preparing
for sleep.

As I hurriedly
pointed the remote
and powered off,
I breathed a frustrated sigh
for the state of our world.
No longer are crime shows
and murder mysteries
simply entertainment,
but too often
are copied
from recent headlines.

When I was in my twenties
I enjoyed mysteries
(they contained very little gore,
actually I didn't even know
who Al was at the time;
but I digress)
Then in my thirties
not too far from where I live
a high school student
was kidnapped
and murdered.

Soon after
the killer kidnapped
a little girl
and murdered her.
By this time
I had a little girl
of my own
and my built in maternal alarms
went off in a big way.

Now
twenty years later
kidnappings,
homicides,
gang shootings,
rapes
are almost common place.
During this same twenty years
violence
(again mostly towards women)
in movies and TV
has escalated
to an alarming terrifying level.

We all know
that there are unstable
persons
out there
who are living
on the edge
until something
pushes them over
into the abyss.

We now occasionally
hear of
unspeakable actions
that were copies of a scene
from a movie
or influenced by
some other media.

Shows like CSI
are using scripts
that were news events
so recently it is shocking
(to my sensitivities)
that the families have either
ok'd this or have it thrust upon them
just as I did.

Ok,
the point I am making is this.
How can intelligent people
not see
the relationship
of violence
breeding violence?
I realize
that some people
have stronger stomachs
than others me.
And, I am thankful
that doctors
and nurses
especially
can handle
blood and gore.

But,
what about
the rest of us?
What about
conditioning,
desensitising
and garbage in/ garbage out?

How many parents
are watching these programs
with a child nearby
who has refused
to go to sleep?
And how many
young women
are watching
with a new love interest,
they barely know?

I love a good mystery,
but in my opinion
this type show
isn't one.

And most of all,
I wonder
how the writers,
directors,
producers,
actors,
TV execs,
and local station managers
sleep at night.

"Be very careful, then, how you live - not as unwise but as wise."

Ephesians 5:15

Think Before Using Free E-Cards!!

Do you send e-cards? Are you especially drawn to the FREE card sites? Be Careful How You "Make A Difference' online.

Maybe you were drawn in by the Care2 claim that by sending their cards you will " help save the rain forest". The site uses words like Inspiration, Love, Information and Action. I was introduced to this card site by a family member who loves animals and wants to protect them. And Care2 does love animals! Unfortunately they may love them more than they love human life!

But did you know that your card use could help support stem cell research? Maybe you don't know a lot about stem cell research, in that case they will gladly send you a primer with all the facts. They first get your attention with "sick children".The one thing you need to know is this blatant statement:

".. a tiny ball of cells growing in a culture dish cannot reasonably be equated to a human baby."

I wonder if this was derived after speaking with the parents whose children began in a culture dish?

This is pretty interesting since they list CHRISTIAN eCards in their list of cards available. They also list PAGAN CARDS. They believe in EARTHJUSTICE-Because the earth needs a good lawyer! I'll bet I am not the only one who thinks unborn babies need representation, too!

This is just the kind of web site that a child would be drawn to. The pictures of animals and the Earth friendly ads. Such an easy way to subtly own your child's mind.

Even many who are not christian or who have sick children are uneasy about stem cell research and the direction it could take. Perhaps some doors should never be opened.

Maybe you are in favor of stem cell research, but make sure you have all the facts before you influence your children with complicated ideas. God tells us in scripture:

"Now this is what the Lord Almighty says:

'Give careful thought to your ways.' "

Haggai 1:5

Show CARE 2 that you CARE TOO! Stick with proven Christian free cards such as http://www.crosscards.com/

A Life is A Life, No Matter How Small

I believe what God's word says about life,

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you," Jeremiah 1:5

I vote life not pro choice. As far as I know my Christian friends vote the same way. Any of us would be quick to speak for pro life and against pro choice if we were asked our views. We would probably recite scripture to back up our claims. Why then do we act as if we do not believe this? How can we expect the world to understand our pro life view if we do not live as if we believe it.

When my daughter lost her third pregnancy we were heartbroken. We had viewed the ultrasound, we had prayed for the health of this child. We were devastated. Yet, when Christian friends asked how my daughter was doing and I replied, "She has lost her baby." (not a miscarriage) most said things like, "Oh, that happens, she can have another." Since when are human beings so easy to replace as in, "Oh, you dropped your cookie. Here, let me get you another one."

Thankfully there were a few who said, "I am so sorry. or I am sorry your family has to go through this." And I thank God for those few. Most asked intrusive questions, or made shocking remarks. Even from extended family. So much advice to be sifted through. My daughter, and me too, wanted to scream "This is the third time!"

Even her grandmother's first remark was, "How far was she?" This was the # one question. While we realize it is far more difficult to deal with losing a full term baby than an 11 week one, is one a greater tragedy than the other? That is IF we believe what we say we believe. A life is a life. It felt as if the compassion was rationed out based on how far along the pregnancy was.

Then I began to notice that people rationed out their joy and congratulations in the same way. When I announced to my morning exercise buddies that my daughter had just confided that she is pregnant, one of the women quickly remarked, "What is she, 5 days?" "Actually she is 5 weeks", I answered, and then proceeded to give a short lecture on why women do this to other women. Either you are pregnant or you are not pregnant. If you are pregnant then there is a life and if there is a life are we to ignore it until it is of a worthy age?

I think not. If there is life, then I have a grandchild on the way and it would be negligent of me to skip praying for that child because he or she was not "big enough" yet.

So, the result of all the thoughtless, and sometimes hurtful, remarks was that when my Daughter and Son-in-love were blessed with another pregnancy they decided to tell no one. They made this decision in order to avoid the painful remarks if things did not go well. They told me and my husband and my Daughter's boss and allowed me to share with a couple of friends who did not live nearby. So we had a very small prayer team. Eventually they allowed us to share with my son and his wife.

It is stressful keeping secrets, but the need was emphasized for me one Sunday when a friend at church asked about them. I simply said please pray and shared a recent story where an elderly relative had shook his finger at my daughter and said, "You better get to it." He did not know she was pregnant nor did he remember what she had gone through last spring. His shocking remark caused her to feel pressure to provide the family a child. Pressure she did not need. My "friend" said, "Daughter is hyper sensitive" and said it as a criticism. I became pretty hyper sensitive myself and I had to bite my tongue.

So we all held our breathes and prayed until the first ultrasound, all the while trying to hide our joy. A week after the first ultrasound there was a sign of trouble and another ultrasound was performed with a more hopeful outcome. During these weeks every time a the phone rang I was a little apprehensive about answering. When it was my daughter I didn't relax until I heard her sweet calm voice.

One day my daughter and I went shoe shopping and she allowed herself to walk through the baby section of the department store. Excitement creeping in at the thought of sweet babies.

Then came another ultrasound in December and thankfully a new, kinder and more compassionate doctor to give the dreaded news. Even the nurses in this practise said how sorry they were. And this time the hospital staff were even more compassionate because "it's her 4th loss. " For the rest of the world, my daughter dealt with this nightmare alone except for her husband and parents. This time there were no kind church members to bring food or friends to send flowers. We kept the secret so well that three days after undergoing surgery the two of them hosted our annual extended family Christmas party at their home and the guests didn't even know she had lost a child a few days before. Even writing that breaks my heart. They could have cancelled the party but then we would have had to explain why.

Grieving alone. All because we let others steal our joy. There are so many lessons to be learned through this. We shouldn't allow others steal our joy, live what you say you believe, and have mercy, show compassion and empathy for others pain or loss. All you need to do is say "I'm sorry" or simply give a warm hug. Neither of those things will take away the pain, but they won't add to it either. Allow women to grieve, don't try to sweep away their feelings. Every one's grief is different. I grieve not only for my grandchild but for the dream of motherhood for my child. I, also, grieve for my daughter's lost innocence. Life is hard and it is even harder to watch your children suffer. My daughter's grief is different from the worlds grief. She does not grieve as one without hope.

Grief seems more poignant at Christmas, perhaps because our thoughts are on a baby who came to save the world. There are so many reminders of God's love for us and He will magnify our Joy.

"Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials,
knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. "

James 1:2-3

THANKSGIVING DAY 29 PAY IT FORWARD

What a surprise to get my sons call this morning to tell me of our mention in the story in todays newspaper under the heading PAYING IT FORWARD. More on this blessing later!

Thanks Giving DAY 24 - PRECIOUS GIFT

Once upon a time my husband and I thought we could save the world! Or, at least, a tiny piece of it. Our efforts brought us an appreciation for how fragile and precious life is that many never experience. The only treasures that are truly worthwhile are the lives of those who cross your path on your journey. Our precious baby enriched our lives beyond measure. Every year we remember him at Christmas by placing a beautiful blue bird on our tree. The bird was on a gift of flowers for his special service.

I am so thankful that God allowed me to be Spencer's mother during his short time on earth. I know that he was well loved.

"Be not forgetful to entertain strangers, for thereby,

some have entertained angels unawares."

Hebrew 13:2

THANKFUL SIXTEEN - WORSHIP

"I was glad when they said unto me,

let us go into the house of The Lord."

Psalm 122: 1

Today I am thankful for many things. Most importantly, the freedom to worship in the house of the Lord! I am thankful once again for my family, two of my progeny were in worship with me today.

My grandson read scripture today "in front of the whole church!" as he put it. It was a blessing to see him sitting and singing with the children's choir.

He was on cloud nine!!

THANKSGIVING DAY FOURTEEN - GRANDCHILDREN

I was actually thankful for my grand daughter on DAY 13; however she got bumped by the storm and no internet. Today I am double thankful for her. Though she came to me by an alternate route, she is indeed my grand daughter. When my son married her mother she was so sweet in thanking me for welcoming her into the family. It was my pleasure. She endeared herself to me very quickly by writing her 'grandparent story' at school about me. She enjoys reading which is my favorite thing. One of my favorite Bible verses applies here I believe.

"Be not forgetful to entertain strangers;

for thereby, some have entertained angels unawares"

Hebrews 13:2